Faloopa Jones; you blockhead!

You know how everyone seems to crap on Charlie Brown? (not in a 2girls1cup* way - sick!) I feel a little like Charlie Brown today.

As you may know, I need to sell my Pontiac. Last week something happened where the ticker than makes noise when your blinker is on got stuck on. All the time. ticktickticktickticktick the whole time you are driving. It's quite annoying. I figured out (through calling a bunch of calling around is called the hazard switch assembly and it's a dealership-only part. Okay, that works. I called the dealership and they HAVE the part in stock, and it's only $29.99 plus tax! Awesome! I race over and pick it up, install it, and the problem is still there. ticktickticktickticktick the whole time you drive. Crap. Or in Charlie Brown language: AAUGH!

So I call Curt Warner Chevrolet (where I bought the car) and schedule an appointment to bring it in and have them look at a few things: (1) the ticker (2) the cigarette lighter doesn't work (I don't smoke but I do have a cell phone I'd like to plug in while driving) and (3) I'm getting uneven tire wear in the front and sometimes (like when I'm north of about 70MPH) I get a slight shimmy in the steering wheel. No biggie, says Carl at Curt Warner, bringer in at 8:00am Thursday (8:00 am???) and we'll take a look. Cool, thinks I, easy-breezy.

I take my car in at 8:00 am and Audrey does great in the car the whole way there - oh yea, I'm watching Audrey today while Gina's at work. We give Carl the keys and Gina's Mom Carol picks my and Audrey up: since they live a few blocks from the dealership we decided to go play with Grandma while my car is being worked on. At about 10:30 I finally get a call from Carl. "Are you sitting down and do you have a pen and paper?" Carl says to me. Crap, I think to myself. Here's the breakdown that Carl gave me:

1. The lighter won't work because the whole assembly is shorted out and keeps blowing the fuse. To replace it is $84
2. The ticker isn't the part I tried to replace, nor is it the wiring harness, nor is it the fuse, nor is it the celluloid. It's a short in the Multi-Function Arm: the lever that sticks out of the steering column and controls the blinker and headlights. Since you have to rip the whole steering column apart to replace it, that's $357
3. The front brakes are down to 1mm of pad left - and that's bad. Those need to be replaced and the rotors need to be resurfaced for $287
4. Also on the brakes, the brake fluid is due to be replaced, and the current stuff is looking dirty and cloudy. To drain, clean the lines, and refill the fluid is $110
   
5. The tires are unsafe. The front ones are so bald there is cord poking through and the back ones might be okay in the dry summer, but in the wet spring, Carl is actually surprised I've been able to keep my car on the road. All four tires are $520
6. The front end suspension is fine (I was afraid that was the problem) but the car need an alignment. That's $80

So all told, we're looking at about $1430 parts and labor (plus tax) to get all that fixed at the dealership. The ONE silver liner is that the Multi-Function Arm is covered by the Extended Warranty I bought with the car - that one only costs me $100 out of pocket. I guess the other good thing is that it's going to be easier to sell since I can advertise New Tires! New Brakes! New Brake Fluid! Front End Just Aligned! Transferable Extended Warranty - Still Good Until May 09 or 25 Thousand More Miles! That will be nice, I suppose.

Looks like my brand new credit card I got for emergencies will carry a balance right away.....

Anyone want to buy a 2004 Pontiac Grand Am?


*ps - if you don't know what 2girls1cup is, DO NOT look it up. Trust me, you don't want to see it. It's one of the most disgusting things on the web, and not in a good way!