Man, I love to swear.
I don't think I "over-use" swearing, but I do have a pretty foul mouth sometimes.
And I'm the self-proclaimed Master of Innapropiate Comments. I don't mean any of it, but I make some pretty innapropiate comments on a sami-regular basis. Just listen to me while I watch an episode of The Biggest Looser. I really respect those people: it takes a LOT or will power to loose 100lbs! But I make some jokes in the comfort of my own home that I'd never make in public.
And now I have a daughter. A daughter who is going to learn how to talk. By watching me.
I think there is a good chance that Audrey's first word will be something like "douchbag" or "asshat" or something like that. I've really got to put a stop to that. I don't think that Gina's Folks would appreciate it very much if they come to babysit and Audrey says " Scrotum!" really loud.
So I'm going to try to replace swear words with words that are appropiate to most situations. Or I'll start a swear jar (like in the video) and build up a fund to send A to Harvard. Harvard Law. By the time she's 5.
Crap.
I mean crud.
Speaking of: I've always had a problem with people who use faux-swear words in place of real ones. The only reason swear words are taboo is because we all agree they are offensive. So if we sub "crud" for "crap," isn't that really the same thing? If you say "crud" but mean "crap" isn't crud now a bad word? Shoot, that crud isn't even freaking cool! I mean, Jeeze! We all know what teh eff you mean - why not just say the dang word, you know? Common usage, my anus!
My daughter is doomed to a lot of time outs, isn't she?
8 comments:
my four year old daughter was at grandmas house this weekend and dropped something
"Oh damn it!"
yeah, apparently Im not so good at the not swearing thing.
Somethings just dont work unless you swear. Like to say you "half assed" something. How would you say that with out swearing?
Your ability to poetically and artfully swear was one of my favorite things about you. I was sad when we hung out because I realized that you didnt swear hardly at all, and I missed it. I think I even swore, but then felt bad because I was currently holding your innocent little baby. Chris, you have a rare gift at swearing... but I guess we must all sacrifice of ourselves when we have children huh.
It's a hard habit to drop- but honestly, i just don't know how to get around it! Some people are asshats. They arent jerks, they are decidedly asshats. People who say, "shut the front door" instead of "shut the F@#$ up" should be hanged. I'm sorry, it's just how I feel. I, of course, live in Utah county- so i'm privileged to hear the most ridiculous fake swear words known to man. Instead of it making me realize I should stop swearing- it makes me feel that more encouraged and justified in doing so. Then i think of my little baby in my tummy already listening to my sailor mouth every time i play video games, or i think of the whirlwind of swearwords that I am probably going to spew forth during her birth, and I realize that I too will need to change soon :(
Oh, man! I didn't even think about my language while playing video- or board-games!
Crud! I'm all fudged up!
my favorite to question is "f*ckin-A"
because really? on the scale of bad words, I would consider fornication MUCH worse than anus. so should you ....
oh nevermind.
I've revived a love of eff bombs. but still not as a space filler. Adjectives are ok. So are pronouns. And shouts.
yep.
love that one.
crap.
crud.
poop.
sheet.
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